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Monday, May 17, 2021

You Can't Do It

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Ken Grant
Ken Grant
Ken Grant has spent most of his life in Delaware, loves being in all three counties, works for the only U.S.-based manufacturer of Thin Layer Chromatography Plates, is married to an incredible woman who is willing to put up with his antics and is the father of two teenagers who have agreed to wait at least another 20 years before writing the books about their “adventurous” childhood.

Allow me to do some of you a big favor right now – I’m going to state something that could bring you some relief. Ready? Here it goes.

No
you can’t do it.
It’s too difficult.
You don’t have permission.
I say you are not allowed.

OK, now you can breathe your sigh of relief and go back to your life.

Here’s the thing, I am becoming more and more convinced that most people are just looking for an excuse to NOT take on an exciting project, NOT connect with people, NOT try something new – but they just can’t find someone to actually tell them they can’t do it, so they’re left a little flustered and they have to think of all kinds of strange things to justify not following their dreams/impulses/ideas.

Keep in mind, this is not a job I enjoy, but I believe it is necessary, so the next time someone says, “Hey, what about that (insert dream/passion/quirky-idea here) you used to talk about?” You can look them straight in the eye and say, “Yea, well, Ken Grant said I’m not allowed to do it.” It’s a lot easier to say than “You know, I’m really afraid of my own shadow, so I don’t even want to try.”

I predict that as technology improves to allow more and more possibilities for anyone who wants to try new things there will be more people in need of this service

The generic version you see above – that’s free – if you need a very specific, certified, official “Ken Grant says I’m not allowed to do it” certificate, video, poster, or T-Shirt, then contact me and I’ll quote you a price based on how big the dream is that I have to crush for you.

Quick note, though – while you are allowed to apply the “Ken Grant says I’m not allowed to do it” to yourself – you are not to misuse this application on anyone else – I do not want to hear someone say, “I had this dream, but my (spouse/friend/sibling) told me Ken Grant said I wasn’t allowed to do it.” – You can point your spouse/friend/sibling to this post to see if they want to claim this for themselves, but you cannot slap this prohibition on them second-hand.

OK, so those are the basic ground rules – everybody clear? Good.

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Latest News

Fireworks will bloom this summer. Rehoboth, New Castle say theirs are on

Separation Day festivities are canceled, except for fireworks June 12. Rehoboth will light 'em July 3

With so much federal stimulus cash, state predicts surplus of $1 billion

Members of the committees talked about replenishing funds that were used to help weather the COVID-19 pandemic.

Fans celebrate return of NASCAR to Dover Speedway

Almost a return to normal: 20,000 fans hit Dover Speedway and see Alex Bowman win
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